Here and now,  Mom Life

It’s not about the hair

I recently did a write up of my child’s accomplishment on my personal page.  I was so proud of their hard earned achievement, earning a white belt!  My child has been working on this for quite some time.  Social anxiety was a big hurdle for us but also the reason that we signed up for the class to begin with.  Great reviews and generally great program.

They start off with yoga and end with positive reflection.  It was as though this class was tailor made for our needs.

{As it turns out, a lot of parents sign their kids up for this class for the very same reason.  So far, tailor made for a variety of children’s needs!}

I was surprised that the majority of the commentary, on my not-so-humble brag, was relating to my child’s hair.  The reviews were in, they loved the cut.

I appreciated that everyone was so loving and encouraging.  But, did we miss the mark?  Yes.

We turned an achievement into a beauty review.  While there is nothing inherently wrong with showing appreciation and lifting another person up.  There is something wrong with the idea that we validate people – in this case a child – by commenting on their physical appearance.

This is not unique to me.  This is an experience that we have shared for centuries.  We not only have an opportunity but an obligation to leave this world better than we left it. Lets take the time to change that.

Lets vow to do better in how we interact and lift people up.

Maybe tomorrow you tell someone what you admire about their heart?  How their intelligence is showing?  How their very essence is radiating from all of their wonderful and unique qualities?


PS.  I understand that we all do this.  It’s how we’ve been conditioned.  Wanting to say something positive about someone’s appearance is again, not inherently wrong.  Lets just make a vow to take a look at when we are paying these compliments.  Can we offer more?

A good read for adults

A good read on behalf of kids

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